A lot of bowlers said it couldn't be done.

Move and preserve the venerable — infamous, to many — Petersen Classic?

No way, they said, could anyone preserve the ambience and conditions of the only bowling tournament in the world based on humiliation of the competitors.

It was a premise that kept thousands of bowlers coming back since 1921 to the ancient, dilapidated building at 35th and Archer on the south side of Chicago.

As the sign above the exit to the lanes said, "Pete, this is absolutely, positively my next to last year.''

One of the best Petersen Classic stories is the very first game rolled there by Pro Bowlers Association star Marc McDowell of McFarland one day in the early 1980s.

The first time at the Petersen is usually a monumentally humbling experience, even for the very best bowlers, and McDowell certainly was getting his dish of humble pie as he compiled only 88 through his first nine frames.

When he spared in the 10th frame, McDowell exhulted that he'd wrapped up 100.

"No you haven't,"' fellow competitor and Petersen veteran Mark Henry said. "You still need two pins."

McDowell proceeded to chop the 6 and 10 pins off the rack for — yes — 100.

That was the Petersen.

When the monsoon-like rains of the summer of 1993 heavily damaged the Petersen lanes and building, it appeared the Classic was done. The Petersen ownership decided they couldn't afford the repairs and announced that the 1993-94 tournament wouldn't be held.

Eventually, they decided to sell the rights to the tournament and several suitors bid for it, including a St. Louis-area group led by legendary Hall of Famer Dick Weber.

The winner ended up being Hoffman Lanes in the northwestern Chicago suburb of Hoffman Estates.

Almost immediately, the naysayers began their chorus of how the new Petersen could never come close to the old Petersen.

They were wrong.

On Aug. 29, the squad I bowl on took its turn at the new Petersen.

And, truth to tell, if you weren't focusing on the move, it was possible to forget you weren't at 35th and Archer.

The Hoffman Lanes staff, led by proprietor Mark Giannecchini and tournament director George McChrystal, bought everything they could from the old Petersen and transplanted it to Hoffman.

When Hoffman's league season ended in early May, a team of carpenters transformed 16 of Hoffman's 32 lanes into an amazing re-creation of the old Petersen. When the new Petersen ended with the bonus-day rolloff on Labor Day, they went back to work in reverse, turning Hoffman back into a "normal" bowling center and putting everything in storage until next spring.

Hoffman put up walls around lanes 1-18 (17 and 18 are the standby pair in case of a breakdown), covered them with the ancient blue paneling of the old Petersen and hung the huge, stylish protraits of former champions.

The famous "Golden Gates" doors were put up and again are the entrance to the Petersen alleys (the word "lanes" is too nice for the Petersen). The old bell rung to announce the beginning of each squad was brought over and still is used.

The rock-hard wooden benches and other settee area furnishings from 35th and Archer also were brought to Hoffman.

Several old Petersen staffers were hired by Hoffman, including Gladys and John Schober, the Petersen's official photographers for 32 years, and Sandy Patterson, tournament secretary for 15 years.

The only concession was that the new Petersen uses Hoffman's automatic scorers. Losing the crusty old scoremarkers from the old Petersen is a loss, but a small price to pay to preserve the Petersen.

Of course, all the ambience in the world would mean nothing if Hoffman couldn't recreate the famous Petersen conditions.

Trust me, they have.

Ask Bret Faulkner, my teammate and one of Wisconsin's best bowlers, who also bowled on our squad. Bret started his second game like this: gutter ball-gutter ball, 8 count-spare, gutter ball-1 count.

In three frames, with a spare, Bret had a score of 11.

Another guy on our squad had 38 his first game. He totaled 874 for eight games, even with a 203.

A few other new Petersen scoring tidbits: Out of nearly 300 32-man squads, just two managed to average a collective 150 or better.

More than 7,000 games were bowled on notorious lanes 13 and 14. I bowled the 12th 200 or better game on that pair (202).

One man shot a 4 game. Yes, 4. The man threw a big, slow hook and could not physically throw the ball harder. Of course, his game was on 13-14. (Another guy had a 2 game, but he did it intentionally and that doesn't count, even at the Petersen.)

For you non-bowlers, all bowling lanes and approaches have dots and arrows that bowlers use to line up and aim their shots. Not the Petersen. (Not that aiming does you much good at the Petersen, anyway.)

Hoffman's solution was simple — a special lane finish was applied to obscure the dots and arrows.

The other keys to recreating the Petersen conditions were solved fairly easily.

Hoffman bought and is using the old Petersen's pins. The newest are 7 years old, many are far older and all are several ounces heavier than the standard pins used today.

In a feat many thought was impossible, the pins are even harder to knock down than they used to be. A perfect pocket hit with the force of a Mike Tyson uppercut is frequently rewarded with a split, or worse, an ``easy'' spare to miss so your friends can laugh at you.

McChrystal said that's because the pins were exposed to rain, cold and heat for several months after the 35th and Archer building was damaged.

Watching those pins totter around after being struck is like watching a Flintstones episode. Come to think of it, Fred probably bowled against the very same pins at Bedrock Bowl a few thousand years ago.

The oiling pattern, or lack thereof, has been recreated exactly as it was at the old Petersen, thanks to the advice of the tournament's longtime manager Mark Collor, now a consultant to Hoffman.

Some lanes have so much oil, no human could get a ball to hook. Others have no oil and everyone throws a hook, whether they want to or not.

The bottom line is the scores.

One look at the leaderboard tells you Hoffman has been true to the Petersen's history.

No one came close to averaging 200 over the eight games this year. Only two managed 190 — Terry Shiery of Coldwater, Mich., with 1,550 and Tom Adcock of Decatur, Ill., with 1,545.

About 1,400, a 175 average, is projected to get the magic 100th spot — the last to pay $1,000.

First place is paying $35,000 this year, second $17,500. The figures are down from past years, when it was $45,000 and $22,500, but McChrystal said next year's tournament will begin three weeks earlier — on April 24 — to provide enough squads to get the 10,000 entries needed to pay out the same prize list as the old Petersen.

"We're kicking in more than $50,000 this year to the prize fund to make sure we can pay $1,000 down 100 spots," McChrystal said. "We feel that's part of establishing the credibility we need."

(Hoffman also is hosting two extra tournaments on its other "normal" lanes. One is the Lumberjack Challenge, a four-game tournament with normal conditions against 5-pound pins, compared to typical 3 1/2-pound pins. The other is the Jackpot, where you try to get six in a row on one lane against another set of the 5-pound pins to win a jackpot.)

Bowlers who have success at the Petersen all follow a simple formula: throw a straight ball very hard at the head pin, pray for luck and make your spares.

After years of humiliating, fruitless attempts to bowl the Petersen normally, I finally got smart a few years ago. I now bring a hard rubber Brunswick Black Diamond — top of the line 30 years ago — and follow the hard and straight formula. Skip the exotic urethane balls at the Petersen!

In 1991-92, I took over second and ended up eighth. In 1992-93, I was on a pace to take the lead after four games, before falling apart and finishing just out of the top 100.

This year, I had 997 after five games (173-213-188-221-202). Just 554 my final three games and $35,000, plus perhaps another $15,000 for the extra optional events, would have been mine.

Just so the bowlers know what's at stake, the Petersen staff takes breaks after the third and sixth game to use the PA system to announce just what you need and how much money you can make. McChrystal is too nice a guy, though, and doesn't have near the heartless tone of Collor.

One thing the new Petersen doesn't do that the old Petersen was famous for is break down your lanes if you're doing well. I had that happen a couple of years ago when I was threatening to take the lead. This year they left me alone.

At the old place, they used to break down your pair and send you over to lanes 17-24, which were far worse, if that's possible, than 1-16. That happened one year to a Madison quartet that included Bob Ruhland. Moved to the other side for one game, none of the four could break 130.

Once they'd informed me of my choke level for winning, I moved to 15-16 and started with two opens, missing a tough spare and a split. I finished that game with seven spares and a lone strike for 159.

Now I needed 395 the last two games.

On to 1-2, another notorious pair, especially with the wall flush with the left gutter and approach on 1, preventing a normal approach and shot for most right-handers.

Again, I hit the head pin 9 times in 10 tries. The result was worse: zero strikes, one 5-10 pocket split I couldn't convert and one missed 5-pin thanks to psychosis from the wall on 1. A 163 left me needing 232 for the lead.

Lanes 3-4 were much nicer than either 15-16 or 1-2, but a missed 2-5 spare in the fourth frame and a pocket 7-9 split in the seventh, sandwiched between strikes in the 6th, 8th and 9th cost me a chance at the lead.

I spared in the 10th for 179 and 1,498 and fifth place, just three pins from fourth.

Not striking the first ball in the 10th cost me at least $5,000, we figured.

Of course, it could have been worse.

Just two days later, Gene Biesack of Racine came down to his final two frames working on a string of strikes and needing just a strike and then an open with good count, or two spares with good count to take the lead.

Biesack left an 8-10 pocket split in the ninth and then chopped the 3-6-10 in the 10th frame. Those two straight opens dropped him to third and cost him more than $30,000.

Biesack also knocked me to sixth, costing me at least $1,125, although I should still make around $6,000 with optional events.

And, of course, I'll be back next year.

All you bowlers out there who fondly remember the old Petersen, but were wary of the new Petersen, should do the same.